Kids’ Playtime and appreciating the oft-overlooked

I’m laying on my basement couch as I type on my laptop. My two youngest girls, Jasmine and Abbey, are playing with their beloved Fisher Price family toys (I don’t know the exact name of the toys). They’re completely unaware of my observing/studying them. No, I’m not Diane Fossey studying gorillas in the midst of Africa, but watching my kids when they are unaware of my watching them is one of my favorite pastimes.

My wife Diana was commenting the other day that the Fisher Price family toys were the best “investments.”She added, “They play with them more than any other toys.” First of all, the use of the word “investment” by my wife to describe toys. It’s not exactly what I would have used to describe buying toys, but it is a beautiful–and revealing–choice of words. For my wife, toys are not the clutter-the-floors-thus-creating-pick-up-time-messes type of things that they are to me. For her, toys are the things that keep our kids occupied and enjoying life. Diana sees them as investments in our kids. It really is a fundamental difference between my wife and I. (Where would I be without her stabilizing influence?)

I did some volunteer work cleaning toys at a family and child services house a few years ago. As I was wiping every toy down with a Clorox solution, an employee came by and talked about the importance of the toys. She said that if you wanted to learn about a kid, watch them when they play. Our kids play “family” more than anything else. I was just watching Jasmine and Abbey act out spring break with their toys. As a family, we were planning on going to Las Vegas to visit with Diana’s family, but we had to cancel those plans because of some medical complications that arose for Diana (oblique, yes, but I don’t want to elaborate). Anyway, the kids are a bit disappointed with that decision. Their playtime dialogue with their toys underscores that. When I slow down and I take the time to watch my kids play, I learn a lot. More than that, I always have this swell of parental satisfaction and joy for what I have in life. I love my kids and family. God help me to keep my priorities straight when my job pressures me to do other things…

Sometimes I am very envious of my wife and the things she gets to do. Yesterday I worked at home during the AM. This gave me the chance to walk Jasmine to the bus stop at noon. As I turned to leave, Jasmine pulled me down, gave me a kiss and said “Bye Dad.” Then she repeated that again really loud several more times. I think she wanted the other kids at the bus stop to know I was her dad. Tears start to well in my eyes right now when I think of it. What an honor to be a father.

Perspective

Okame Hachimoku

Okame hachimoku. My favorite Japanese proverb. One translation is “The bystander sees more than the player.” I first learned of it during my two years living on the island of Hokkaido in Japan as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It’s stuck with me ever since.

During my undergraduate English studies at BYU, this simple proverb’s underlying philosophy became manifest as literary critical theories. In genres ranging from Native American books to African-American studies to modern British literature, my professors encouraged me and my classmates to seek understanding and meaning using different critical theories; we were to peer through the so-called “lens” of a particular critical theory, and write about what we saw. Certainly, there are limitations to this endeavor—spending the proverbial moment in “someone else’s shoes” doesn’t make us that person. Our vantage point, while temporarily that person’s, is still borrowed. But, rather than discourage us from trying, that understanding should temper what we see with a bit of humility (even after years of study and doctorate degrees and how much we think we understand a person or people).

Notwithstanding the inherent difficulties, I’ve found it to be challenging, humbling, and—ultimately—enlightening to at least try to shift my perspective.

Thoughts on President Hinckley

As others have noted, much has been said about President Hinckley over the past couple of weeks. I’d like to add my thoughts.

In Numbers 11 is one of my favorite verses in the scriptures:

“…Would God that all the LORD’s people were prophets, and that the LORD would put his spirit upon them!” (verse 29)

Moses said these words thousands of years ago, but in recent times President Hinckley put it this way during the General Conference in which he was first sustained as prophet and leader of the Church:

Now, my brethren and sisters, in conclusion I wish to leave with you one thought which I hope you will never forget.

This church does not belong to its President. Its head is the Lord Jesus Christ, whose name each of us has taken upon ourselves. We are all in this great endeavor together. We are here to assist our Father in His work and His glory, “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39). Your obligation is as serious in your sphere of responsibility as is my obligation in my sphere. No calling in this church is small or of little consequence. All of us in the pursuit of our duty touch the lives of others. To each of us in our respective responsibilities the Lord has said: “Wherefore, be faithful; stand in the office which I have appointed unto you; succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees” (D&C 81:5).

“And in doing these things thou wilt do the greatest good unto thy fellow beings, and wilt promote the glory of him who is your Lord” (D&C 81:4).

Further, “And if thou art faithful unto the end thou shalt have a crown of immortality, and eternal life in the mansions which I have prepared in the house of my Father” (D&C 81:6).

All of us in this great cause are of one mind, of one belief, of one faith.

You have as great an opportunity for satisfaction in the performance of your duty as I do in mine. The progress of this work will be determined by our joint efforts. Whatever your calling, it is as fraught with the same kind of opportunity to accomplish good as is mine. What is really important is that this is the work of the Master. Our work is to go about doing good as did He.

Per his wish, I have not forgotten the above passage. How could I? Even now, as I reread the talk this passage comes from, This is the Work of the Master, I am buoyed up and inspired by President Hinckley’s counsel. The tears that I’ve managed to choke down since his passing flowed as I read this talk again.

This world has seen much of false prophets. The media, often interested in exploiting the fantastical and outrageous in life just to scintillate viewers and keep their advertisers happy, provides a disproportionate amount of air time to them. Consequently, I fear, the word “prophet” has taken on a negative connotation in the world. What a shame. Gordon B. Hinckley, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, was a good man of God. He was a prophet.

I’ve known people who, through word and deed, helped me to feel the Savior’s love. President Hinckley was such a man. He inspired me to be a better husband, a better father, a better son of God. I pray my life, as limited in its circle of influence as it may be, might be as good and well-lived as Gordon B. Hinckley’s.

The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass, or Why Nintendo and Apple Dominate

After nearly a month of playing it, my son and I just finished “The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass.” My son got his Nintendo DS and Zelda for Christmas. The family got a Wii. I know a lot of attention is (rightfully) placed on the Wii. However, in the nearly month we’ve had the two systems, the Nintendo DS has been played far more–bar none–than the Wii. Part of this can be attributed to the DS’ portability. Zelda is the other part. This game is great. It’s a classic. It used every part of the DS’ unique design–the stylus (for character movement), the multi-directional pad (for accessing item menus), and–I love this–the mic (for blowing out candles and powering windmills)–to great effect.

With games and systems like Zelda, the DS, and the Wii, it’s hard not to be a Nintendo fanboy. Nintendo is to video gaming as Apple is to consumer electronics/computing. Both companies have creativity ingrained within their respective company’s ethos. Their competitors’ stocks and sales continue to drop. Why? They don’t innovate. Nintendo and Apple do. I don’t own their stock (I should have bought in 2000), but as a consumer, I’m happy to contribute to their bottom-line as long as they create stuff like Zelda.

Favorite family games

Our family (OK, me especially) likes to play boardgames. Read my list of favorite family games.